I am insecure.
I worry about saying the wrong thing, about hurting my marriage, about wearing the wrong pair of shoes to the retreat and having people talk about me.
I'm concerned with what people think. I'm concerned about my deep, hard-to-root-out sin. I hate that I have such weak self-control.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again-- I am quick to point out my own mistakes and flaws.
I think many of us are.
We see these things in our lives and think, "Ugh. I didn't want to be like that."
Or, instead of focusing on internal issues, we can point to all the ways life didn't turn out the way we wanted it to.
I have lots of that. Every month, I'm reminded that my plans haven't really happened, yet... and it's so easy for me to find discontentment and doubt instead of finding the joy.
If you're being really honest with yourself, you know what I mean.
I didn't really want to be like this, you know? I never thought this would be my story... and yet. Here I am.
When a fellow blogger in a group I'm a part of mentioned that she had a new study out, I was interested.
When she said that the title is, "I Didn't Want to Be That Girl!" I was pretty well hooked.
I have to disclose that I did get a copy of the study for free in exchange for this review, but guys? I'd totally buy it.
I actually did this study on my own. Yeah, I know, I'm always talking about the benefit of small groups and community, but my group had a little hiatus (which, frankly, was mostly my fault), and during that in-between time, I dug right into this wonderful study.
"I Didn't Want to Be That Girl" covers an incredible range of issues. From knowing the goodness of God to marriage to persistent sin... this book is a broad one. It's complex, because it's based on the experience of a human being... and we're kind of complex.
Looking at the topics presented, I was a little concerned that this would be a skim-the-surface kind of a study, but it's really not. Despite the wide range of things covered, this study really delves into the Word, and into the heart of so many of the struggles I know I face regularly.
The conversational, almost sisterly tone that Sue uses really put me at ease and made me feel like we were sitting down for tea somewhere. She connected personal stories to each study in a way that really helped me to relate.
Sue presents really introspective questions that made me do quite a bit of thinking and even more soul-searching. (Like, Am I really longing for Christ's return-- or do I want x, y, and z to happen first?)
In short- I liked this study a lot.
I still have it on my nightstand. Because even after the eight weeks were over, I keep going back to certain lessons and looking them over again, turning them over in my mind.
So, if you're looking for a study to do with your small group, or if you're simply looking for a way to get back on track with your quiet time, I'd recommend "I Didn't Want to Be That Girl!"
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