When infertility is an issue, family gatherings and holiday parties can be minefields.
The questions. There are always questions.
When will you two have a little one?
You look so nice holding a baby... when can we expect one from you?
Don't you want kids?
Honestly, they almost always mean well, but knowing that doesn't help in the moment.
Good intentions don't keep me from, say, choking on that sip of sparkling cider, my face turning as red as those holiday napkins, and then hurrying to hide in the bathroom to cry. Not that I've done that. <ahem.>
The truth is, as well-meaning as they may be, the majority of the people asking those baby-related questions just don't understand.
They can't. They haven't been there.
It can be so tempting to just grin and bear it, put on a mask and hide my true feelings. Sometimes it's a bit of survival, too.
But when I'm not really being myself, really being transparent, I'm also not letting anyone else in.
It's different when it's with my sister, though.
My sister and I are very much alike, and she's kind of my go-to person when it comes to dealing with some of the holiday family drama. We are similar enough that she really understands a lot of the struggles I'm dealing with, because she's been there.
That kind of empathy is important- it creates a special relationship. We can be transparent with one another, because she gets it.
